Back From The Abyss: Monday Mishegas

·        Donald Trump to CNN’s Candy Crowley “Either I’d go in and take the oil or I don’t go in at all…in the old days, when you have a war and you win, that nation is yours.”  Old days?  Like in the Middle Ages.  I am not shocked by this statement; one would expect a man who treats the business world like a game of Monopoly would view warfare like a game of Risk.

·        This just in: Arizona Governor Jan Brewer vetoed the Arizona Birther Bill that would have required candidates for President to present proof of birth in order to get on the ballot in Arizona.  "I never imagined being presented with a bill that could require candidates for President of the greatest and most powerful nation on earth to submit their 'early baptismal or circumcision certificates'… this is a bridge too far. This measure creates significant new problems while failing to do anything constructive for Arizona."  Diggapedia is still stunned.

·        The United States Armed Forces have been involved in over 100 armed conflicts.  Do you know how many times Congress has actually declared war?  Just five:  1812 (Britain), 1846 (Mexico), 1898 (Spain), 1917(Germany and Austria-Hungary), and 1941(Japan, Italy, and Germany).  I guess police action, use of force, and operations aren’t really wars and our troops really don’t die.

·        Dateline Netherlands.  Anti-animal cruelty advocates and anti-immigration zealots have joined forces to ban the practice of ritual slaughter of animals and thus denying Jews and Muslims their rights to practice their religion.   It is sad to see how reactionary and xenophobic the Dutch have become since the days of Anne Frank.

·        Businessman Bernard Baruch “Vote for the man who promises least; he’ll be the least disappointing.”

·        Lots of debate and revisionist history getting spewed from the South and TEA partiers about why the South seceded from the Union to start the Civil War.  It seems slavery was not the issue, but preservation of states’ rights was in fact the cause.  Really?  If the South was all about states’ rights then why did the Confederacy require all states to support slavery and commit men and material to the war effort?  Also, please explain this little ditty from Confederacy Vice President Alexander Stephens explaining that the South was fighting to defend “the great truth that the Negro is not equal to the white man” and that “slavery is his natural condition.”

·        Kevin Na carded a 16 last week on the Par 4 ninth hole at the Valero Texas Open.  I hereby declare that “I pulled a Na on that hole” will be the equivalent to “pulling a Munson” as portrayed in the Woody Harrelson movie Kingpin.

·        Dancing With The Stars, So You Think You Can Dance, Dance Your Ass Off, and The Dance Scene.    Deney Terrio was ahead of his time.

·        Jersey Shore has now spawned spin offs in the form of new shows for Snookie, Paulie, and Jwow.  Did I say how much I like dancing competition shows?

·        My favorite Congresswoman Michelle Bachmann’s latest truth bender  "Well, remember, again, already the top 1 percent of income earners pay about 40 percent of all taxes into the federal government. So if you want to talk about fairness, the top 1 percent are paying 40 percent of all of the income."  Unfortunately for the fact-challenged TEA partier, the correct answer is between 22 – 28%. 

  Chag Sameach Pesach