Sunday, March 13, 2011

Bachmann and Cliff Claven: One in the same.

With Michelle Bachmann’s recent troubles with American History (a) the founding fathers worked diligently to abolish slavery and (b) the shot heard ‘round the world took place in New Hampshire, I took the liberty to identify TEA party heroine’s next historical mix ups:
1.      Remember the Alamo was about the government takeover of the car rental industry.
2.      The Continental Congress use to meet at Newark Airport.
3.      The Mason-Dixon Line is a railroad route.
4.      Federal farm subsidies go as far back as Plymouth (MA) Plantation.
5.      The Underground Railroad was the first NYC subway and it was built by great patriots who hated taxes.
6.      The Missouri Compromise was when major league baseball put teams in Kansas City and St. Louis.
7.      The Articles of Confederation were Robert E. Lee’s and Jefferson Davis’ civil war correspondence.
8.      The Harpers Ferry Raid by John Brown was in response to the PTA in nearby Harpers Valley telling parents what snacks their kids were allowed to bring to school.
9.      The Spanish-American War was fought when the US Government mandated that Spanish became mandatory in the public schools.
10.   The Transcontinental Railroad linked North America and South America through the Panama Canal and that’s what brings so many illegal aliens to America.

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